Short Answer "Pop" Quiz (20 points)

For complete credit, you need to formulate organized, unified, concise responses that also use correct citation mechanics. 


1. Who is Jack Lewis that makes it hard for Albert to sail under him, and what do his characteristics imply about Albert's motivations for going along with him? Use appropriate passages support your thematic interpretation. (10 Points)



2. What do we discover has happened to Laurids Madsen, and why does this make some thematic sense when looking back at Laurids' involvement in the war in the first chapter? Use appropriate passages support your thematic interpretation. (10 points)

Brief Writer's Tip on Sentence Combining

Use sentence combining techniques to show the relationship between different literary elements as they work together to form a thematic idea.

One logical suggestion of many: use the different literary elements as the subjects of your two combined sentences.

Use an organizational pattern for the sentences: cause & effect; classification/definition.  How does one element coordinate with another and make a specific meaning?

theme:

Theme: 

The theme of a fable is its moral. The theme of a parable is its teaching. The theme of a piece of fiction is its view about life and how people behave.

In fiction, the theme is not intended to teach or preach. In fact, it is not presented directly at all. You extract it from the characters, action, and setting that make up the story. In other words, you must figure out the theme yourself.

The writer's task is to communicate on a common ground with the reader. Although the particulars of your experience may be different from the details of the story, the general underlying truths behind the story may be just the connection that both you and the writer are seeking.

• In reading We, the Drowned: themes are not presented directly, and must be interpreted through comprehension of characters, action, and setting of story. So, to better understand the "view about life and how people behave" that the novel gives us, we have to do the following dirty work:

While (re)Reading for theme | For class discussion:

• Highlight and comment on repeated actions, language, imagery.
• Note down character views of life and also how their lives turn out.
• What tone does narration take? This gives insight into how to take the story's action. Look for sentences in the story that seem like the narrator's commentary.

Sketch Outlining a Repeated Theme:

In your own words, what do the boys of Marstal really learn about Marstallers way of life from Isager? Your answer should interpret the plot and characters--evidence-based thoughts.

For supporting your interpretation, you would need to do the following:  

1. Outline three major actions that the boys take against Marstal. For each, what results from their actions? Pull out a few quotes for each action that helps you understand what's going on more.

2. Outline Hans' character. Include: what does he say about life after Isager? What does that tell you about life?

3. Outline Lorentz' character. Include: how does he change, and what does that mean?

4.  Outline Albert's character: 

• How does he look to solve problems? To get to a more specific answer, outline a major action and/or response of his over the last three chapters read: 

• "The Thrasing Rope" =
• "Justice"=
• "The Voyage"=

Sentence Combos

Methods for Combining Sentences for Sentence Variety  (or Fixing Run-ons)

The key to the type of combining technique/run-on edit is determining which technique best emphasizes the relationship between the two ideas of the separate independent clauses/sentences.

• Use a comma and a coordinating conjunction: another easy fix (20a, p. 191), find where the second sentence starts and add the comma with the right FANBOYS conjunction.  [Of course, if you have a comma splice, you just need to add the right conjunction after the comma.]

• Example comma splice: Some lesson plans include exercises, completing them should not be the focus of all class periods.

• Fix: Some lesson plans include exercises, but completing them should not be the focus of all class periods.

• Use a semi-colon to connect two complete thoughts: also very easy (20b, p.191), the function/purpose of a semi-colon is to join two independent clauses/complete sentences. 

• Rules for Writers suggest, as well, that you can use a colon or a dash. Warning: make sure you know the function of both (191-192) before you consider using either. 

• Colons are good to use when introducing a quote (192).

• Example fused sentence: Tragedy depicts the individual confronted with the fact of death comedy depicts the adaptability of human society.

• Fix: Tragedy depicts the individual confronted with the fact of death; comedy depicts the adaptability of human society.

• Use a semi-colon, followed by a conjunctive adverb (a type of transitional word or phrase): (20b, 191), more difficult to pull off, though really good to emphasize a relationship between two sentences that are being combined. 

• conjunctive adverb: conjunctive is like conjunction--it means to join, just like a highway junction is the connection of two different routes!

• They are words that imply further action, or a furthering of the idea, such as "thereafter" and "moreover" and "however"

• Example fused sentence:  We ran the race hard we ran to win.

• Fix:   We ran the race hard; moreover, we ran to win. 

• Turn one of the sentences into the subordinate to the other: the most difficult grammatically (20d, p.192) for one still getting the hang of sentence structure, but can be worth it for sake of showing a clearer relationship between two ideas.

• One of the independent clauses is turned into a dependent clause by adding a subordinating conjunction to the beginning of the original clause. 

• Example: We went out to a fancy restaurant for dinner; we were disappointed.  (How boring is this grammatically correct sentence!?!) 

• Subordinating one to the other: Although we went out to a fancy restaurant for dinner, we were disappointed. (Edits make this one sentence where one idea takes importance because of the subordinate conjunction.)

HW for Wed., 9/24

1. Continue reading the novel. Focus your reading notes on themes of gender differences, life at sea, and "meaning of life." What types of images, metaphors, and actions are repeated by characters? How is Albert different from other characters?


2. Read chapter 14, pages 141-152 in Rules for Writers.

Below are a three terms that are used often in analyzing literature, and are therefore good for us to
know and use to make larger connections from the text to our lives.


1. Irony: language device, either in spoken or written form in which the real meaning is concealed or contradicted by the literal meanings of the words (verbal irony) or in a situation in which there is an incongruity between what is expected and what occurs (dramatic irony).

Verbal irony arises from a sophisticated or resigned awareness of contrast between what is and what ought to be and expresses a controlled pathos without sentimentality. It is a form of indirection that avoids overt praise or censure, as in the casual irony of the statement “That was a smart thing to do!” (meaning “very foolish”).

Dramatic irony depends on the structure of a work rather than its use of words. In plays it is often created by the audience’s awareness of a fate in store for the characters that they themselves are unaware of, as when Agamemnon accepts the flattering invitation to walk upon the purple carpet that is to become his shroud. The surprise ending of an O. Henry short story is also an example of dramatic irony, as is the more subtly achieved effect of Anton Chekhov’s story “Lady with the Dog,” in which an accomplished Don Juan engages in a routine flirtation only to find himself seduced into a passionate lifelong commitment to a woman who is no different from all the others.

In the 20th century irony was often used to emphasize the multilayered, contradictory nature of modern (and postmodern) experience. For instance, in Toni Morrison’s Sula (1973) the black community lives in a neighbourhood called the Bottom, located in the hills above a largely white town. American ethnic writers in particular employed irony in works ranging from memoirs (e.g., Maxine Hong Kingston’s The Woman Warrior [1976]) to novels (e.g., Gerald Vizenor’s The Heirs of Columbus [1991]) to disrupt racial stereotypes. (Britannica)

***

2. Allegory: a symblic fictional narrative that conveys a meaning not explicitly set forth in the narrative. Allegory, which encompasses such forms as fable, parable, and apologue, may have meaning on two or more levels that the reader can understand only through an interpretive process. (See also fable, parable, and allegory.)  (Britannica)

***

3. Allusion:  in literature, an implied or indirect reference to a person, event, or thing or to a part of another text. Allusion is distinguished from such devices as direct quote and imitation or parody. Most allusions are based on the assumption that there is a body of knowledge that is shared by the author and the reader and that therefore the reader will understand the author’s referent.

Free-write:

Be creative in your thinking. For 15 minutes, let yourself answer the following set of questions for opening discussion of the text:

What is the purpose of war? What are causes and effects of wars? How is war portrayed in We, the Drowned?

In-text Citation & Work Cited

Within your Essay final draft you must do the in-text citation, which includes these basic elements:

• Include the author's last name the first parenthetical citation:
• the first time you use the source, and
• anytime you use multiple sources and go back and forth between cited works

• Use of (p.#) at the end of all cited passages. 

One clarification I want to make is on web sources: you do NOT include the web address. As you see with those on-line sources in the example page on 532, web sources are indicated in other ways.

In-text Citation Examples (the E of PRE): your source material is evidence, not the topic sentence! Therefore, you should NOT start off body paragraphs with evidence. Doing so will be assessed against Organizational categories on the essay rubric.

• In Kitchen Confidential, Anthony Bourdain outlines various characteristics of what he looks for in those he employs in his kitchen. Among the many qualities, Bourdain emphasizes that his employees must be humble and reliable. The chef believes that a kitchen can only put out a quality product if the staff is able to follow the boss's vision. In fact, Bourdain brashly states that Latin American immigrants are stronger employees than privileged "CIA-educated white boys" simply because of these qualities (56).

• One example where Bourdain expresses his love of ______ is when he writes: "..........." (77).

• In the chapter "Big Foot," Bourdain writes about his admiration for the qualities of one of his former bosses, which includes ...insert qualities... (89-93). 

• Being a reliable person is emphasized by Bourdain when he states, "........." (52).

Some qualities and requirements to notice in the above examples:

• Start off with your thoughts/context, then go into citation...

• Subject matter that source is supporting should be subject of your sentence

• Use a solid verb (writes, states, exclaims, argues..., but NEVER 'says')

• Lead in to your cited passages with your own idea, or at least with context from where the source is coming from. Here are some things you MAY do:

• Use transitional phrases (introductory phrases are good, right!).

• Use the author's name (last name or whole name)/character's name to set up what the author is doing with the quote.

• Contextualize the passage the excerpted passage is from.

• Start with the key idea you want the reader to see in the quote as the subject, then attach the quote as a dependent clause (such as the last example above does).

• Page number is placed in the (page#), no matter if summarizing or quoting.

• The end punctuation always comes at the end of the citation, AFTER the ( ). 

• Exception:  If a ! or ? is part of the quote, leave it there and then use a period after the ( ) to indicate end of citation.  

• Ex.:   Bourdain then wrote, "What was he thinking!" (pg.#). 

• The first parenthetical citation you have should include the author's last name IF you don't name the author within your own writing. 

• So, if you didn't introduce Bourdain in your own sentences, you'd have to also write (Bourdain, page #) in the first citation. 

• When you have multiple sources/authors that you are writing on, you will want to get in the habit of using (author's last name, pg #)

Work Cited Pages (Bibliography)

At the end of your essay, you need a page that includes a list of all sources used in the essay. There is a great model of what a Work Cited page looks like on page 532 in Rules for Writers.

• If your essay has only the one cited work and you have space left over, I am okay with you including the Work Cited page right after the essay ends (saves a tree or two!). Just make sure to:
• Give some space between final essay sentence and your label of Work Cited
• Center the term Work Cited
• Have a space or two between Work Cited and the end citation.

You will also need to consult page 526 to check all of the basic formatting requirements of this page, including:

1. Alphabetizing your list by author's last name, or whatever information (editor, book title) your particular source lists first
2. Single spacing individual citations
3. Indenting the second line on of any end citations that go past first line

General Guidelines for MLA works cited

• There is a list of types of sources (pages 490-523) and how to write an end citation for different types of source material. Use these pages to identify your type of source, or use a reliable on-line citation guide, such as Diana Hacker's MLA guide.

Work Cited citation that connects to the above example in-text citation:

Bourdain, Anthony. Kitchen Confidential. Updated ed. New York: Harper, 2007. Print. 

• In both in-text citation and in Work Cited page, the author's name is key. The reader can easily find your end citation when you do your job as the writer. This is important because:

1. Citation rules allow readers to find your sources so they can do their own reading/research
2. The in-text citation strategies allow for your essay to cleanly point to sources without distracting from the essay's own ideas. 

HW for Wednesday, 9/17

1. Revise your essay, adding better context.

2. Read this MLA In-text Citation Guide, and also review the same topic in Rules for Writers. You are to also read Chapter 3 on "Making Global Revisions."

Both the link and the MLA pages in RR essentially give you the same basic structure points for integrating sources. We will review how to use these techniques and also add some logical considerations, on Wednesday.

Put these Passages in Right Contexts

These are specific quotes from the text, each of which can be effectively used as part of a larger argument because they illustrate what the war was like. These are powerful images, scenes, etc. However, on their own they do not answer our Essay 1 topic. As writers, we have to think about how to use each passage.

First, let's discuss some of the scenes that these are part of, and then develop questions and points about Beah's moral conflicts that these support.  With time, you will re-draft one of your essay points and put one of these passages into context of that revised idea.


Page 69:

• "To survive each passing day was my goal in life."
• "I thought about where my family was and whether they were alive."

Page 80:

• "After the rebels had raped the sisters over and over, they bundled the family's property and made the father and mother carry it. They took the three girls with them."

Page 87:

• "A group of more than ten rebels walked into the village. They were laughing and giving each other high fives. Two looked slightly older than me. They had blood on their clothes, and one of them carried the head of a man, which he held by the hair. The head looked as if it was still feeling its hair being pulled."

Page 107:

• ""This man and this child decided to leave this morning even though I had told them it was dangerous. The man insisted that he didn't want to be part of our war, so I have him his wish and let him go. Look what happened...."

Page 116:

• "A young soldier came by with a plastic bag full of some kind of tablets."

• ""It is better to carry more ammunition than food and water. Because with more ammo, we will be able to find water and food, but with more water and food, we will not make it to the end of the day," the corporal explained."

Page 121:

• "...I took turns at guarding posts around the village, smoking marijuana and sniffing brown brown, cocaine mixed with gunpowder, which was always spread out on the table...."

• "We all wanted to be like Rambo; we couldn't wait to implement his techniques."

Pages 151:

• "It turned out that the bruises were from bullets that had merely torn my flesh as they missed killing me. I was too drugged and traumatized to realize the danger of what had just happened."

Page 153:

• "I had come to believe that people befriended only to exploit one another."

Page 165:

• "It was the first time I had dreamt of my family since I started running away from the war."\

• ""None of these things are your fault," [Esther] would always say sternly at the end of every conversation. ...I began that day to believe it. ...That didn't make me immune from the guilt that I felt for what I had done."

Revision: Developing More Context for Situation

Context

• Background information

• Vital considerations for looking at the facts/actions/examples (such as, how have things changed, or what caused those changes)

• ***Imagine an ignorant reader

• What does a person who has not read what you did or does not think like you not know about your subject that will help them grasp a person's actions, etc.

• ***What are you assuming? Sometimes when we write our first thoughts/drafts, we take a lot of content for granted and we don't reflect upon things that are small but significant to our own understanding of a subject...

• For instance, with our first drafts of Essay 1, many of us ignored important facts in making our claims:

• Beah and his friends are children in the middle of a war
• Beah and his friends are without their parents and other family
• Government and its role in peoples' lives
• Causes of action. Before the action.

• In short, almost every writer discussed a lot of how Beah was in the moment he made immoral choices, but not many contrasted those acts with what caused them, what informed those decisions.

• Look at "the whole picture" (the whole story) when making claims. Each passage you cite is connected to the larger story, the larger person being analyzed. When you write about a scene from early in the text, you need to consider and use appropriately the knowledge you have from the end of the text. You also have to consider any information that comes earlier in the text. Good logic dictates a holistic point of view.

In Revision: Restructure at least two of your body paragraphs (BP) by consciously implementing at least one of the following in each BP.  Which pattern should, in part, be decided by your Point. Then, the Reasons and Examples are ordered more tightly by the following patterns used:

Contrast (or comparison)

• For instance, contrast a specific Beah theft with that of an example outside the text. How are they different in circumstances, and how does that decide morality?

Cause and Effect

• For instance, what are a few things that cause Beah's extreme hunger? You can't just say he was  about to die--you have to describe and cite specific events that help shape Beah's mindset

Before and After

• For instance, what was Beah like during and after he was rehabilitated? What does he confess to his readers? 

Classify

• For instance, what are levels of hardships? What are levels of hunger? What defines those levels? Or, to go another route: are their classes of moral decisions, and what are the characteristics of each class? You as the writer can create those classifications--give us boxes to see the action within each. 

Analogy

• For instance, what are similar situations and characteristics for which a reader might understand the foreign concept of war? What's a possibly lesser situation you are familiar with that equates to decisions made by those in war? 

HW for 9/15

1. Finish reading A Long Way Gone

• Reflect upon the folktale that Beah tells at the end of the memoir. Why would Beah decide to shoot the monkey? What does his choice imply about "good" versus "bad"?  

2. Continue revising your own Essay 1, especially your introduction paragraphs, thesis, and topic sentences should be able to be improved based upon course discussions and lectures.

Morality and Faith: a new hook...

Around 24 minute-mark into the penultimate episode of The Following's second season, the sociopath wax's poetic about the idea of morality and religion. Let's review this scene and then explore how the argument made, in context of real life, what is said relates to the child soldiers of Sierra Leone.



How, then, does this video relate to the working thesis: Beah's having to steal and kill in order to survive the war illustrates how morality is dependent on circumstances.

• Beah and the other children are torn apart from their families, chased village to village by murderous rebels. 

• Beah's morality depends on a civilized society, but war instilled fear in everybody.

• ....

DRAFTING AND REVISING Essay Introductions [The Opening Paragraph(s)]

General Introduction Content

1. Hook: opening sentence(s) of essay that sets up your topic

2. Put the hook in context for thesis topic: background information on thesis topic

3. Thesis statement and subtopics that body paragraph explores

General Hooks (p.26 in RR)

The purpose of a hook is to draw your reader in to what you have to say. You don't want the hook to sound too broad and anonymous. You want to one of the general hooks below in a creative, but thesis-connected way: 

1. Relevant quote

• When hooking reader with a quote or a fact (#5), build the clearest context by using an introductory phrase

• (Specific person--use adjectives to identify,)  wrote/stated?/inquired/..., "...."

• According to ________, ...

• "...," wrote ________. (so the phrase becomes a transitional phrase that allows that quote to be quickly connected to your 'new' ideas.)

• Or...try out your own introductory phrase that gives context.

2. Personal anecdote (brief story with a clear message)

3. Provocative and relevant question or statement.

4. Specific Example that fit your subject (perhaps one you will actually bring back and expand on later in your body

• Specific can involve a clear individual person/thing/place or a clear group of people/things/places
• specific: the Ford Focus; Michael Jordan; Hollywood actors; Beah
• too broad: people, everyone (wrong!); workers; we; them...

5. Relevant fact: particularly one that sets the tone and allows you to explore the fact specifically as it relates to your thesis.

•  For example, a fact about how many different ethnicities live in the USA in an essay in which the writer explores how food is a ticket to other cultures for them. 

Logical Steps an Forming that Introduction Hook

1. Have your thesis and subtopics at least drafted and outlined; these ideas are your map directions!

2. Decide which type of hook most interests you. Think about your essay: purpose, audience, subject matter, and most importantly--who are you? 

3. Try drafting a hook that lasts for 2-4 sentences. 

• A good hook will use "key words" and be "as specific as possible" --> there are different levels of the idea of "start broadly and funnel down." The best writers understand, or at least work on, the nuances of "specific" versus "broad."

• Rather than opening up so broad that you start with "Morality" -- start with a specific moral conflict (one that relates to your essay's subject matter).

4. Use language in your hook sentences that will reappear and unify your transition to the subtopics and thesis.   (This is why having a solid, focused thesis statement helps a lot. You can borrow words there to inspire the opening sentences...)

HW for 9/10

1. Essay 1 first draft due.  Read Rules for Writers, Chapter 2: “Draft the Paper.” Not only should this help your draft of Essay 1, but we will further discuss "drafting introductions" next class as a way of looking at revising the first draft you bring typed to class.

• In short, besides being penalized for not having your essay, you would love out on an editing and revising workshop on your introductions if you weren't prepared for Wednesday. 

2. Read A Long Way Gone, Chapters 13-16 (114-151).  Chapter 14 shows Beah being recruited into the state army (not the RUF rebels). Some of the things "brainwashed" into Beah and those soldiers may be relevant topical points for your essay, either draft 1 or later.

Subtopics into Topic Sentence: logic in crafting

What are some of the subtopics in which there are morality conflicts?

• Hunger (which we discussed last week) and its impact
• ...

P: Use one of the following verbs to write a topic sentence about "hunger and its impact" as it relates to your larger thesis statement for Essay 1:

• teaches
• illustrates
• demonstrates
• signifies
• distinguishes
• implies
• attributes
• suppresses
• reveals
• symbolizes
• challenges
• accentuates

Other things to consider:

• Try to be precise with your subject--don't just think you have to use use "Beah" or "Beah's morality"-- effective writing strategies are not that simplified. There are other options (infinite) that are specific and precise--you just have to think of them and use them! So try on a few varieties of phrases that relate to the prompt. 

• In the object of your sentence, try to think about and allude to ideas you see inherent in the specific examples that you will use to support this statement. In other words, look at the topic sentence as a foreshadowing of your supporting reasons and examples.

• A clear, specific idea is not going to support itself, so be okay with that. Your topic sentence will NEED you to support it with at least one or two sentences that give reason to your point. 

R

E

HW for Monday, 9/8

1. Read in Rules for Writers, Chapter 4: “Building Effective Paragraphs” and PRE (blog post). 

2. Read A Long Way Gone, Chapters 10-12 (69-113)

• A really great question, of many, that can help you develop your analysis is one that comes off an on-line study guide for the book. This same question is available to discuss before class through our Canvas discussion board:

• What do you think is more sad in accordance to the study of basic humanity, the fact that the rebels “boasted about what they had done that day”, or the fact that the actions were committed by youths?  (Stark Classroom)

3. Work on Essay 1 thesis statements and subtopics. 

HW Reading: Unified Paragraph Structure Strategy

http://home.europa.com/~bence/pre/

The above picture is Steve Prefontaine, a world-class runner who died too young. His nickname is Pre. Look at how focused his eyes are in this picture and remember those eyes when you remember our focusing technique, PRE.

http://www.justrunners.com/Steve%20Prefontaine%20Poster.htm

http://en.nkfu.com/steve-prefontaine-quotes/

PRE teaches us that to be the best one must put their best effort into all that they do. PRE can also teach us, again, how to write a unified body paragraph. 

Point: start each paragraph off with a sentence (we call it that Topic Sentence) that states who/what the paragraph is about--your subject--and what you have to say about that subject in that paragraph.

Reason: follow up your Topic Sentence with some logical reasons for why you believe your point is true.

Example: follow up your reasons with specific examples that support your point and reasons. You can also add a second E to Example, and that would be Explain! Make sure that when you illustrate your example that you also make sure to explain how it connects back to your Topic Sentence.

Example:  Here is the article we read for today: "In the Beginning," and below are model PRE body paragraphs that incorporate some example facts from the article and the quotes above. These body paragraphs make basic summary points about "how Prefontaine learned to be successful, according to the article." (We will discuss the different structure of Introductions and Conclusions over the coming semesters.)

       Steve Prefontaine, who held many American records in distance running, is a great example of how much effort plays a role in having success in life--even during high school years. Prefontaine started off as one of the weaker runners on his high school team before setting goals to become a national record holder by his senior year.  In the article "In the Beginning," Michael Musca discusses how Prefontaine could not break five minutes in the mile his freshman year of high school, and as a sophomore failed to qualify for state. However, by his junior year in 1968, he went undefeated and won the Oregon state cross country meet in. Musca writes that "From this point forward, the winter of 1968, young Pre embarked on McClure’s 30-week program, which he hoped would yield the time goals and a state championship in the two-mile" (Musca). Prefontaine would run four to eight miles a day while working multiple jobs. His setting goals and following them is what lead to his success during those years.

       Those high school years are a small example of showing how setting goals matters; Prefontaine also had the work ethic and mindset to accomplish his goals. Steve Prefontaine is widely known as the ultimate competitor. He fulfilled his goals by training extremely hard and by maintaining an aggressive mindset that he would maintain for the rest of his life. There is no better evidence than Pre's own words: "To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift" (Just Runners). These are the words of a competitor, someone who does not settle for finishing a task. Another quote of Prefontaine is "I'm going to work so that it's a pure guts race at the end, and if it is, then I am the only one who can win it" (NKFU). He confidently believes that nobody can beat him if he works as hard as he can.

        Prefontaine's successes came from also following a clear plan of actions to take to accomplish his goals. Pre's high school coach, Walt McClure, helped lay out a training program so that Prefontaine could set the records and live up to his goals. McClure set Pre up on a 30-week training regiment in the winter of 1968 that helped Pre win state in the two-miler that Spring. Prefontaine continued to run at least four miles a day during that following summer, even as he worked multiple jobs to help his struggling family (Musca). Prefontaine won the two miler his senior year in a national record of 8:41.5 (Musca), which shows how much one can improve in something if they are really dedicated to their own success. 

       Prefontaine was never known as a fast runner, but his effort on those days off helped propel him towards national success at an early age.  ...

Generating Thesis Statements and Subtopics (a review lecture)

Thesis statement:

• The sentence that states the main point you are making for the entire essay. All points made in essay are meant to support this statement (sometimes posed as a question).

• Use specific language over abstract/too general words, whenever possible.

• Use an action verb to indicate to your reader how dynamic you are looking at your subject (in Essay 1, Ishmael Beah's morality). 

• The more action on the subject, the more you transform our view of it. The more you can pose questions about subject with that verb.

• something is  v. something illustrates.

• DO NOT BE ELUSIVE. DO NOT TEASE YOUR READER!!!

• One of the most ineffective thesis statements is the type that only suggests ideas but doesn't actually identify what ideas will be developed in the body paragraphs:

• Poor, poor thesis teaser:  Beah's memoir challenges the definition of morality in many ways.   (Pray-tell, what are those ways? You haven't said anything we don't already know. You haven't made a point, a statement, an idea.)

• Better little thesis: Beah's actions and choices show that defining morality is a difficult task. (This one gives us two general-specifics in "actions and choices," which more clearly outlines where the writer will go in the body, but each could be more descriptive and specific.)

• Best of the three: Beah's having to steal and kill in order to survive the war illustrates how morality is dependent on circumstances. (This writer provides the clearest focus for the essay, and we look forward to seeing how their claim that theft and taking a life may not be immoral! They have the clearest position on the topic!) 

Thesis subtopics do the following:

• Develop the thesis point

• The thesis is the whole car; the subtopics are the car door, tires, steering wheel, etc.!

• 'Show up' in introduction

• Either in thesis statement or introduced as part of the contextual information provided in the entire opening paragraph....

• Each subtopic is then reproduced as a topic sentence of a body paragraph. By "reproduced," we do not mean that you simply re-use the same sentences. We want new sentences that add new information to an idea that was already laid out. 

To generate starter subtopics (before you write an essay draft), here are some (only some) things that strong essayists do to organize their messy thoughts:

• Make a list of things that you see repeated throughout a text. Actions, words, images, etc. Then, ask critical questions on those simple patterns you see.

• For example:  1. Beah steals food multiple times. 2. Rebel kids shoot and kill adults.

• Be Socrates. Be curious. One critical question on the text should lead to answers with more questions. 

• For example: If morality includes right behavior, what does Beah do that is right?  Answer: He attempts to avoid joining RUF and becoming a killer. Question that spawns from that: If Beah believes killing is wrong, then how is he moral if he does end up killing people? ...and so on down the rabbit whole of critical thinking!

• From all of that work, make a list of three to four big ideas you feel are related and fit together. This is both hard and easy. You must be willing to think critically about the text, your own beliefs, and decide the best set of directions for your essay. 

• In narrowing down your body paragraphs to 3-4 subtopics, you have to decide which ones are repetitive, which ones are most relevant to thesis, which ones show the most variety, etc. Your job is to give a dynamic set of directions.